Night

Another sleepless night Lord. Another nights of prayer and thought, worry and fear, tossing and turning. They are such long nights Lord!

I wonder sometimes if you want to speak to me in the dark for a reason God. Is this the best time for me to listen? Am I less distracted, more in tune, ready to listen? Is it only because my mind can grab hold of whatever it is and mull it over in peace? I don't know the reason, but I do know some of my most heartfelt yearnings come to light when I talk with you in the darkest part of the night. And as tired as I am the next day, I'm grateful for the time with you.

I'll be tired today Lord. I'll be longing for sleep by this afternoon and I hope tonight you grant it. But I'm grateful for the time we spent together last night and empowered by the spiritual awakening.

Earth love

I am so in love with your creation God. This earth, our home, continues to define the word "awe" for me and I never fail to gasp a little when I come upon some of the beauty all around me.

This season is especially beautiful. The recent full moon, coming up as though out of the ocean as brightly orange colored as though it had been a piece of fruit, moving almost fast enough for the naked eye to observe, and then showing all its glory as it shone bright white in the night sky, sending glittery reflections across the water in a shimmer of diamond dust.

And today, this early morning as the sun rose and the air felt crisp and clean, I watched in amazement as the light crept across the open field and turned the dawn into the day.

This may only be my temporary home Lord, but I am grateful that you have made it as perfect and lovely as possible. I can only imagine what you have in store for the second act!

Heartache

Lord sometimes my heart aches with the burden of relationships. They are hard to maintain and we humans are fragile beings! Love is not always enough to keep us from hurting one another or being hurt ourselves. And the more we love the more painful it is. And yet you tell us to love! And you show us love! And you want us to open our hearts to others. That means being open to pain. I so resist that Lord!

Dear God give me the wisdom I need to be the person who heals and secures relationships, not the one who harms them. Help me know what to say, how to say it, when to say it, and most importantly when to say nothing at all. These are the hard things Lord!

And when there is damage done, Lord give me the humility to accept the consequences, the grace to do whatever it takes to heal, despite my own hurt, and the satisfaction of knowing I did my best. And may those I love strive for the same.