Thursday, May 27, 2010

One of those days

Oh - this was one of those days God! One of those trying days where everything goes wrong and you wonder what you did to deserve it all. The septic system is backed up, the carpenter didn't show up again, the traffic was horrendous, money ran short for get the idea.

There are days like this, Lord. There are days when I just want to throw up my hands and cry to the sky "Why?"

But then, well, I stop long enough to remember that I have a septic system to go bad. There are others in the world who don't even have a roof over their heads at night. And I think about the fact that I have a car to drive so a little traffic shouldn't be such an annoyance. And I seem to have enough food that I need to lose weight so being short a week isn't going to hurt anyone. For every point there is a counterpoint. For every negative, a positive.

Tomorrow is another day God. And it will bring challenges of its own. And also blessings.

Monday, May 17, 2010

So tired

I'm so tired God. It's been a long day and my back aches, my feet hurt, and my head is swimming. I've put in a long day, I've worked hard, and I need to just chill.

Dear Lord thank you for days like this. Thank you for good health and a busy life, for being alive and knowing how blessed I am. Thank you for days like this when my aching body reminds me of how important it is to keep getting up at 5:30 in the morning to go to the gym, and for making sure I fuel my body with the right food and drink. Thank you for allowing me a glimpse of life without a strong body, so I can fully appreciate the difference.

I'm so tired God. And I'm so happy to be tired.

Thursday, May 13, 2010

After the rain

It's the day after the rain and God, it's beautiful! The world looks freshly washed and the air is crisp and cool and the rain has made me feel invigorated. I want to get out into the world and do things. I want to enjoy life to its fullest. I want to feel the warmth of the sun and walk in the green grass and feel alive.

Alive, God. What a glorious way to feel. How wonderful to feel good and want to do things. What a blessing it is to be able to make the most of every day. I am beyond blessed, God, and I'm so grateful.

Yesterday it rained but today the sun is shining. Thank you for reminding us that if we are patient, the sun comes out and warms us up again. And if life sometimes brings us rain, it's because it's all part of the deal. Rain and sun, snow and wind, flowers and trees, love and blessings: I've known them all, God, and I'm grateful for each of them. Only through the tough times do we learn to appreciate the amazingly special ones.

Saturday, May 8, 2010

Danger zone

Dear God why is it that despite your many warnings to us in scripture, I still seem to open my mouth and put my foot in it on a regular basis? Why is that I can't seem to manage to keep this mouth shut more often and then keep my thoughts to myself rather than feel the need to share them with others? And why, oh why, do I have such a knack for annoying people when I'm trying to help? I think I'm doing something good - and it turns out to be bad. Oh God, sometimes I'm such a dunce!

God I know you want to inhabit me in every way. I know you want to control my thoughts, my tongue, my actions, my everything. Help me to stop and think before I express my feelings or offer an opinion. Help me to allow you to inhabit my being and take control. And help me to just be silent when silence is what is needed. Help me to realize that not saying anything at all can sometimes help accomplish your will and that sitting back and not doing anything can actually be a good thing. Because no action is better than the wrong action. And nothing said is better than the wrong thing.

Most of all God, fill me with your spirit, that my words might be your words and my thoughts your thoughts. Empty "me" and fill me with "you". Oh God - save me from myself!

Thursday, May 6, 2010


Well God once again I am scratching my head at life. There are just so many things that I don't understand. So many injustices, so many mysteries, so many conundrums - I can only put my trust in you because I have no trust in anything else.

Life can be exhilarating, puzzling, joyous, wonderful...and a complete mess. It can also be satisfying, comforting, difficult, and unmanageable. It's something new each day and never the same twice. Sometimes its the gift I want to give back and others its the gift that keeps on giving. And God, I need you every day to take me through it. Thank you God for my life.