Walking

I walked two miles at dawn this morning God. I saw your beautiful earth waking from its slumber and the start of a new day. I walked fast, and I could feel my muscles tire, my lungs gasping for air, and my feet wanting to rest. I was grateful for the pain and I rejoiced in that walk, God. Because a year ago it would not have been possible.

God I'm so grateful for my life. I thank you for this past year and all that I've learned in it. I'm so full of appreciation for every single day, for every single step, for the ability to push my body to its absolute limits and feel it burn with exhaustion. I came home from my morning walk and sat in my living room, praising you for the gift that is my life. And asking forgiveness for the years I took it all for granted: my life, my health, my many blessings.

Thank you Lord for all of it. Thank you for the fatigue of a long, busy day and the ache of well used muscles. Thank you for this flawed, unattractive body that I have never loved. Forgive me for that! And Lord may I use this body now for your glory - every day, in every way. Forgive me when I don't feed it properly or exercise it to keep it in the best shape possible.

And Lord, may I never take for granted a day when I can walk quickly for two miles and wear myself out. It's a wonderful thing!

Mysteries

Dear God, your ways are mysterious to me and I don't understand them. I think I have things figured out, that my life makes sense, that everything is falling into place, and then it all falls apart. I feel as though I'm finally getting my act together and the curtain rises unexpectedly, catching me unprepared. Life is such a strange experience - exhilarating one minute and confusing the next.

I'm glad that you're in charge Lord, because I don't know which way to turn most of the time. I need your wisdom because on my own I am unable to make decisions and can't find my way through the maze. Thank you for walking with me and helping me find my way. When I lie awake in the early morning hours, unable to sleep because my mind is so full or angst and worry, thank you for reminding me that although I may be confused and unsure of my way, you are not.

Because your mysterious ways are unknown to me, but they are my comfort.

Discord

Oh God, how your children must grieve you! How sad that your people cannot work together in peace, but allow the enemy to use them to tear your church apart, to demoralize their brothers and sisters, and to stand in the way of your work. How your children must grieve you.

Lord save us from ourselves. Show us your way and help us overcome the enemy, working together to move forward with your message of love. Help us to reflect you to the world and reach out to those who need you.

Oh God please help us to overcome the challenges of dealing with our people.

Oh God, how your children must grieve you!

Good day

Today it's so good to be alive, God. It's a beautiful day and life is good.

But I'm especially grateful, Lord, that every day is a good day to be alive. Because every day has become a gift to me after so many years of taking them for granted. Every day I can get out of bed and make a contribution to the wold makes me thankful. I will never again fail to see how lucky I am to be alive.

When it rains I'm grateful for the gift of water for the earth. When it snows I'll look out over the beautiful winter blanket and think about how beneath it all are the roots of sleeping plants preparing for the earth to warm up. And I'll be grateful for a day to sit inside and enjoy the comfort of a warm house. When the spring awakens the crocuses and daffodils I'll rejoice in the beauty coming out of the ground. And when the sun is so warm we need to escape it, I'll be thanking you for the joy of living near the ocean. I've learned to find the blessing is everything and I thank you for that Lord.

Today it's a good day to be alive, Lord.

This amazing body

Lord how amazing is this creation of yours, this human body of mine? How incredible that I can have surgery one day and then watch in wonder as this body heals itself, slowly mending cells and stitching itself together, skin becoming strong and secure and muscles gaining power and bulk as time goes by. How blessed are we that we can be in bed one day, feeling as though we will never be well again, and only a few days later feel the touch of your hand as we heal, and find ourselves able to move freely, rejoicing in the miracle of life.

How amazing is this creation of yours God - this frail, sturdy, weak, strong, flawed, perfect body of mine.

Tired of the grind...

God I'm tired of the grind of my "new" life. I'm so grateful to be feeling good and know I'm doing well, but Lord - I'm weary of doctor's offices and medical tests and all that goes along with this new life. I'm tired of the hours spent in my car, of the hours spent in waiting rooms, of the wasted time and money spent on tests, of the pain and inconvenience of being stuck with needles and lying in uncomfortable positions in MRI machine - and fighting traffic to get to all those appointments. I just want my old life back Lord.

Forgive me for being impatient and for wanting what I cannot have. I'm not unappreciative of my life God and I'm so grateful for the year I've had. I celebrate my life and I thank you for every day of it. Every day is a gift and I know that. Please keep reminding me Lord, when I sit at the lab having blood work, or lie in a machine being tested - remind me how lucky I am to be there. And I will continue to be grateful.

Overwhelming

What can I do when life seems overwhelming God? There are days when I'm buried in things to do and I think things could never get harder. There are times when terrible things happen and it all seems insurmountable and sad I want to crawl into my bed and never come out. And I wonder how I'm supposed to cope Lord.

Then I remember that you are the one who will help me overcome. You are the one who is there for me to lean on. You are the only one who can help me put one foot in front of the other and keep on going. And you can also help me do it with joy. Because the joy that comes with your presence can make it possible to go on. And the knowledge of you gives us motivation to move forward. Because there is nothing we can face that you have not been through and there is nothing we will go through alone.

Thank you for helping me get through this day Lord. And thank you for helping me get through this life.